Tucson’s Slaughterhouse has been a city institution for over 20 years. Built into an actual haunted slaughterhouse, this haunted attraction has been one of my personal favorites since I first visited, and they’ve kept up the quality. That’s why I was so crushed to hear that they’d sold their property and were closing their doors. Thankfully the sale closing got pushed off just long enough for them to open up for one more season.
The haunt is a bit smaller than usual; they’d already taken down a large section before getting the go ahead to open, but the quality seems to be better than ever. This is the best I’ve ever seen them. If the Slaughterhouse is going to die, at least they’re going out on a bloody high note. Though who knows, maybe they’ll come back from the dead. Such things are known to happen during spooky season.
If you’ve been here before, you owe it to yourself to try it one last time before it’s gone. If you haven’t been, come find out what you’ve been missing out on. You need to visit this haunt.
The cast at the Slaughterhouse seems to feel a need to get all their energy out before the doors close. They kept the same number of actors that they usually do, but with a smaller footprint the scares are far more packed in.
The carnival scene at the end feels especially packed with clowns; they are everywhere. There was a ton of variety in what they did and how they approached me, but they all were acting like their unlives depended on it.
I was mocked incessantly for walking through on my own, having people bursting out of hiding from all sides. One actor in particular stood out because her unique cry has now gotten me multiple years in a row. I have been to well over a hundred different haunts at this point, many of them year after year. I know all the tricks, I’m very, very hard to get the jump on. Generally, I just walk through with a big grin on my face because I love haunted houses so much. She has managed to startle or unsettle me multiple years in a row now. It is starting to give me a complex.
Costumes and SFX makeup are a strength of this haunt. They have makeup artists on staff and do not tend to rely on things like premade masks or cheap plastic weaponry.
You have your run-of-the-mill spooks rounding out the cast, but several monsters stood out in a good and unique way. The effort and diligence were there; other than a few forearms that looked a little too pale to be properly matched with the rest of the grime, I did not notice any mistakes. It is easy to get lost in what is going on when things feel so lived in.
The Slaughterhouse uses a virtual line, and I truly wish more haunts would follow suit. When you check in, they take your phone number, and when it’s your turn you get a text message. Until then you are free to wander and enjoy yourself. Once you get your text, your name is checked and then you wait in a much shorter line to be allowed to enter. It works really well and eliminates slog that comes from visiting a well-loved haunt.
This haunt is not hard to find, but parking can be as scary as the attractions. You park in gravel next to a variety of industrial sites, then walk down a dark road to the haunt entrance. It is a side effect of the venue; there is no room for a parking lot, but it is worth mentioning as a minor inconvenience. Otherwise, everything moves smoothly, and I have no complaints.
The start of this haunt feels good, with a lovely facade welcoming you into the crypt-like area which begins your experience. Carnevil works even better, a clown berating you for not standing against the wall as they space everyone out to ensure there is no instance of the haunted house conga line. This haunt keeps your attention throughout, with enough atmosphere and cast members to keep you in the zone the entire time. The effect is not ever broken from the moment you walk in; you are just in the vibe. There is no story to speak of other than spooooooky, but there does not really need to be. You know what you are there for, they know what you are there for, and they give it to you.
Sound is something that can really break a haunt if it is not done properly. The best you do not notice is a special effect; it just sets the mood of the scene. Slaughterhouse uses it very sparingly; but when it works, it works. I never really noticed sound or lack of sound until something happened, like chainsaws from behind a sheet of plastic. It is a good balance to strike.
Scene design is really well done; with the Carnevil especially great, but all of it rock solid. Even the plywood fronts of the crypt area in front does a good job of setting the scene; you forget that you are in Tucson about one hundred feet from a grilled cheese stand.
There is not much in the way of visual effects. I noticed a zombie booth was broken and so was a fog swamp they tried to use, but nothing especially took away from my enjoyment.
21. How scary was it? (35% of score): 8
22. How well did they provide scares to everyone in the group? (15% of score): 8.5
23. How predictable were the scares? (25% of score): 8
24. How well did they provide a wide variety (types) of scares? (10% of score): 8.5
25. How strong was the ending / finale? (15% of score): 7
Fear is in the eye of the beholder. Two people that walked with me through the Carnevil seemed to be terrified, jumping at every moment. They were great at coming at us from behind or the sides, using distractions to keep us unbalanced and then getting us when we least expected it.
There was a good variety, banter to threats to silent looming. The only thing really missing was a finale. At the end of the attraction things just ended unceremoniously. Overall, though, I would call Slaughterhouse one of the more intense haunts in the area.
Slaughterhouse was shorter than it used to be, clocking in at 18:30 on my stopwatch, but with a reduced price of $25, you still get a Minutes Per Dollar value of 0.74. That is very respectable and on the high side for the area. It is especially great when those minutes are as packed as these were; there’s truly little downtime.
You are not going to get much else for your money. A screen plays horror remixes of popular songs and the episode of Ghost Adventures they were featured on. There was also a shirtless carnival geek you could staple money to, so, that is certainly something. I am not sure what, but something. Still, you’re going to get a lot of joy from that money. I pleaded with you to visit Slaughterhouse before it permanently closes at the start of this review, and now I am going to ask again. Please do yourself a favor and go. You are not going to regret it.
1102 West Grant Road, Tucson, Arizona 85705