Lonesome Valley Farms Valley of TerrorFull Review
180 Fairgrounds Road, Greensburg, PA 15601(View Full Attraction Info)
Features:
✓-Free Parking✓-Restrooms/Porta Potties On-Site✓-Food/Concessions✓-Gift Shop/Souvenirs✓-“Old-School” (Low Tech)✓-You will NOT be touched✓-Movie Characters✓-Original Characters✓-Uncovered Outdoor Waiting Line✓-Indoor/Outdoor Attraction
This attraction was reviewed on October 4, 2019 by Team Houdini.
How Do We Get These Scores?
Final Score: 7.48
How Did We Get This Score?
Summary:
In the beautiful Laurel Highlands of Pennsylvania, resides a hidden secret. A farm isolated from society, forgotten in time, and overrun with insidious creatures and spirits. Every fall season it reemerges, beckoning the brave to step foot on this cursed farmland looking for new souls.
Lonesome Valley Farms: The Haunted Hayride with Maze Trail and ‘Slotter’ Farmhouse and Barn (what a mouthful) is in its 32nd year. Opening in 1988 to bring additional income to the farm due to a severe drought, it is still going strong and has become a tradition for many residents in Greensburg and the surrounding areas.
This secluded farmland in the hollow provides a great setting for a moonlit hayride through the cornfields with your friends and a couple dozen creeps.
Cast: 7.64
How Did We Get This Score?
There was a good amount of diversity in the characters that were portrayed. That being said, most of the actors encountered (out of the 60 or so we saw), were your general startles, roamers, and one-liners. We would have liked to have experienced more individual acting and interaction with the characters. Not to say that there were no stand out performers as there were several enjoyable personas especially on the hayride.
During the hayride, we met with an interesting group of dead clowns and entertainers at the freak show. Some jumped on and off of the hayride to interact with the passengers as others pranced around the ride.
A Crazy combine driver screamed at us as he came increasingly close to our tractor. He also had a passenger that rode on top of the combine, about 20 feet high, Freddy Krueger. Apparently, that was one very quick Freddy or they have developed teleportation because he popped up several times on the ride. However, his most impressive entrance was when he appeared on top of a hearse. Did I mention the hearse was chasing our tractor and that he leaped from the hearse to the tractor? This was quite an impressive feat both by Freddy and the actor driving the hearse in a skeleton mask mere inches from our buggy.
A deranged mental patient that joined our ride stepped on my feet (twice) and yelled, ‘Watch the piggies’. We found this quite humorous.
Aside from this, some of the actors hung upside down from the sides of the wagon to scare unsuspecting victims which was very impressive.
There was also a crazy cowboy, a disfigured bride, dead country folk, chainsaw-wielding maniacs, Michael Myers, and more who all provided a creepy ride.
In the maze, we found mainly lurkers walking around popping in and out of the corn. We also saw a scarecrow creature, I believe, it was hard to tell as it was fairly dark out. We found more zombies and dead patients in the Slotter House.
Costuming: 7.64
How Did We Get This Score?
The costumes were nicely done. All of them appeared real and authentic. The clowns had impressive outfits that seemed more circus quality than costume. Freddy’s outfit was authentic and complete with a hat, glove, sweater, and mask that were spot on. Michael Myers had his jumpsuit and the cowboy looked like a classic cowboy. Also, the dead bride’s dress looked like a real wedding dress.
The makeup looked professional and detailed. Blood looked dark and gooey. The clown’s faces were neatly painted which exaggerated their features.
Masks were diverse as well. Freddy’s mask looked legit and not your typical store-bought mask. Another character had a steampunk-style mask.
The most impressive and original costume we came across was the Minotaur located in the Slotter Farmhouse.
Customer Service: 8.83
How Did We Get This Score?
We had no issues finding Lonesome Valley Farms. A quick search in Google Maps GPS led us straight to the location. The owners did mention that when entering the address to make sure the ‘s’ is included on fairgrounds. Some GPS systems have an issue without the ‘s’. This is also mentioned on their website. The site also lists plenty of useful information including cash only and that there is no ATM on-site.
Lonesome Valley Farms will take you on a moonlit hayride, corn maze, and haunted house. You will encounter the normal safety concerns from low light areas as well as walking on outdoor trails. The staff does a good job of keeping everything as safe as possible. We did not find any safety issues out of the norm. Safety is a priority as the owners have security throughout the haunt and even have chaperones on each hayride to keep everyone safe. As we exited the ride, they provided lighting to make sure no one fell or left anything behind. We thought this was a nice touch.
Speaking of the staff, everyone we met from the parking directors, ticket takers, security, and chaperones to the owners were extremely friendly. We enjoyed our conversations with the owners Jeff and Denise, a sweet couple that are very passionate about their haunt and more importantly the enjoyment people get from it.
Atmosphere: 5.9
How Did We Get This Score?
Heading out to Lonesome Valley led us to a journey through the countryside of the Laurel Highlands. As the sunset, beautiful views led us deeper into what seemed like the middle of nowhere. Upon arriving, there was a large sign for the attraction. The attraction is not easily seen from the main road. There were multiple farm buildings we passed on the windy road heading to the valley where the haunt is located.
The parking lot was modest and led to the ticket booth. It was lined with a wooden fence with color-changing lights and silhouettes of witches and trees. Once inside the main waiting area, there was a food and drink area, porta-potties (that were well maintained), a large fire pit, a shop with Halloween d������cor and trinkets. Creepy music was floating through the valley drawing our attention to The Slotter Farmhouse. The old rundown residence was illuminated in an eerie red glow. Further down is the boarding area for the tractor rides. As the darkness consumed the valley it was harder to see what lay beyond the tractor station. The trees now became shadows from the pale moonlight.
The location definitely provides an isolated feeling which sets the mood for the rest of the experience. Unfortunately, there were no actors roaming the lines or interacting with customers before entering the haunt. This would be a welcome addition in the future.
Special Effects: 7.88
How Did We Get This Score?
The first thing we noticed on the hayride was the sound design. A sound system was attached to the hayride with two speakers one in front and one in back. Each scene that we encountered had a different soundtrack providing spooky music and sound effects exclusive to that set’s design. It was a nice touch that added more depth and immersion to the events that were unfolding in front of our eyes. One thing I did notice was a slight crackle in the speakers. As an audiophile I noticed it but no one else seemed to catch it.
The cornfield trail provided a mix of silent areas and outdoor sound effects. The silent areas provided an uneasy feeling as we wandered through the corn waiting for something to jump out from the rustling noises. The sound effects were a mix of wind, howls, crows, and more outdoor noises that fit this area well.
The Slotter Farmhouse outdoor waiting area provided threatening music. Once inside the house, each room had sound effects to accompany the theme of the room. The living room had demonic whispers, the baby room had disturbing nursery music, and the outside bar area had similar sounds to the previous trail with the addition of barnyard animals.
The set designs in all the attractions were well done with excellent details. The hayride and haunted house provided the most elaborate set pieces. The corn maze doesn’t warrant extensive designs. Considering this is not a big name haunt with a large budget, the owners pulled off some very unique and original concepts. The majority of the animatronics they created and designed themselves which offers a one-of-a-kind experience.
During our time exploring these grounds, we always felt engrossed in our surroundings. With the natural layout of the farm, corn stalks, surrounding woods, and haunt design we felt deeply immersed.
Theme: 8
How Did We Get This Score?
Farmland, check. Cornfields, check. Old farmhouse, check. Tractors, check. Hay, check. These are a perfect recipe for a haunted hayride/corn maze/slaughterhouse farm, stuck in the past. Basically, this town and farmland has been slightly abandoned since the 50’s. As you go through the hayride you travel through a forgotten town inhabited by the demented characters that never moved on. This includes a traveling freak show, an abandoned mine, a defunct saw mill, a ghost town, campgrounds, and more until you reach the Slottter Farmhouse. The Slotter Farmhouse was used to make animal hybrids that now roam the grounds. This was definitely an interesting concept.
Scare Factor: 7.18
How Did We Get This Score?
We did notice a decent amount of families and younger individuals at the event. Although I wouldn’t say this is solely a family-friendly attraction, it is not as over-the-top and violent as others we’ve seen. This is a more traditional, old-school haunt.
The hayride provided the most interaction with the actors. The best scares on the hayride were by the actors who ventured onto the ride to terrorize its victims.
The trail provided mainly boo scares as people popped in and out of the corn maze.
The house provided a mix of animatronic scares and boo scares from the actors. There was not much dialogue or banter with the actors.
Throughout each section, the actors worked hard to attack all customers in the group without being too predictable.
One thing we’d like to mention that we have not seen as often here recently is the end scare or finale. Each area had its own finale. Two of them may have been haunted house tropes but at least they were attempted.
Entertainment & Value: 7.25
How Did We Get This Score?
This was an overall enjoyable experience with the hayride and Slotter Farmhouse providing the best scares and the hayride providing the best actors. In the future, an increase in actors and more interaction would add so much to the existing fa������ade they have built.
Unfortunately, there were no outside actors roaming the lines. However, this was the area homecoming weekend and there was hardly a wait between haunts. On a busy night though, it would be nice to have some interaction and entertainment.
There is also a non-haunted flashlight 5-6 acre corm maze you can get lost in for an additional $10.
To experience the hayride and Slotter Farmhouse it will cost you $25 (cash only). There is no VIP option listed.
Between all of the haunts, it took us a total of 35 minutes, so the MPD is 1.44, which is higher than the average seen most often.
Lonesome Valley may be a farmland stuck in the 50’s but the haunt design takes us back to the mid to late 90’s to a slightly old-school, classic, a reminder of how the haunt industry was before huge budgets, gore, and violence really existed. After 32 years, they are obviously doing something right. It’s a great time for the family although I would suggest older children. They have some solid scares, great set design, and it was created by amazing and passionate people, so it is definitely worth a visit!
How Did We Get These Scores